by hubraumhugo on 1/28/25, 8:35 PM with 82 comments
by segasaturn on 1/28/25, 9:07 PM
Mine:
>Roast
>Spends so much time worrying about privacy that their tin foil hat probably has better specs than their Linux machine
>Claims to hate algorithmic content but probably spent 3 hours carefully curating their YouTube feed
>The type of person who would write a 5000-word essay about why they're leaving Apple's ecosystem instead of just... leaving
The last part is almost too real. Soon, hopefully...
by bironran on 1/28/25, 9:05 PM
"So passionate about system design, probably tries to optimize their grocery shopping with distributed algorithms"
Both are so true!
And on a more serious note, "Will develop an open-source journaling platform focused on grief support and mental health" sounds like an amazing project to dive into. Possibly, deepseek, possibly...
by spiffotron on 1/28/25, 8:59 PM
Stop knowing me
by thesuitonym on 1/28/25, 8:53 PM
And that's probably the funniest thing anyone's ever said about me.
by 4ggr0 on 1/28/25, 8:43 PM
JSON.parse: unexpected character at line 1 column 1 of the JSON data
hugged to death already :(
by rikafurude21 on 1/28/25, 8:58 PM
Damn. Deepseek got me.
by cootsnuck on 1/28/25, 9:01 PM
It got me lol.
by vegabook on 1/28/25, 9:04 PM
Error
JSON.parse: unexpected character at line 1 column 1 of the JSON data
worked second try though. Classic non determinism meets deterministic expectations.by enobrev on 1/28/25, 9:02 PM
Loved the roast: "Spends so much time automating their cat's litter box, we're wondering if the cat is actually the one writing the code".
by gigel82 on 1/28/25, 9:54 PM
>>>
Profile Summary
This user is a passionate advocate for privacy and a critic of corporate data practices, often challenging the status quo and pushing for more transparent and user-controlled solutions. They frequently discuss AI, local computing, and the importance of ethical tech practices.
Roast
It looks like this user's love for Rust is only rivalled by their love for roasting Apple. Maybe they'll start a support group for fellow Apple critics?
With all the talk about local AI and self-hosted solutions, it's a wonder this user doesn't have their own personal cloud yet. Maybe they're just waiting for the perfect moment to launch their own 'private' empire.
This user's comments are so detailed, it's like they have a PhD in Privacy. Maybe they should start a blog to share all that knowledge—or better yet, a book!
by mywittyname on 1/28/25, 8:52 PM
by routerl on 1/28/25, 9:03 PM
"Predictions for 2025 Personal Projects
Will start working on a novel semantic search engine for Chinese literature, combining their interest in both Chinese culture and search technologies"
Oh wow, I've been working on this for the past two months and haven't posted about it yet.
by georgehill on 1/28/25, 9:08 PM
i am flagging this post
by rofrol on 1/28/25, 9:33 PM
- Spends so much time talking about Zig that even their keyboard autocorrects 'big' to 'zig' - Has probably spent more time configuring Nix than actually using the software installed with it - Could write a PhD thesis on build systems but still can't build a consistent sleep schedule
:D
by Geee on 1/28/25, 9:13 PM
by valiant55 on 1/28/25, 11:19 PM
We need to invade China to put an end to this abomination.
by louthy on 1/28/25, 10:08 PM
# Profile Summary
A seasoned CTO with 20+ years of experience who bridges the worlds of pure functional programming and mainstream C# development through their popular language-ext library.
Their technical expertise is uniquely complemented by a deep background in music production and DJing, bringing an interesting perspective to discussions about both code and audio technology.
# Roast
Spends so much time trying to make C# functional, they probably write their shopping lists as immutable monadic sequences
Has more vinyl records than successful attempts at explaining monads to OOP developers
The only person who gets equally excited about LINQ query syntax and jungle music track listings
by seamossfet on 1/28/25, 8:47 PM
by A4ET8a8uTh0_v2 on 1/28/25, 11:32 PM
My roasts:
- Their debugging skills are so sharp, they can find a bug in a single line of code… with the help of ChatGPT, of course! - If their HN alias project doesn't pan out, they can always start a support group for EM-DOSBOX enthusiasts. - They’re so into retro gaming, they might just emulate their entire career in 8-bit.
Predictions for 2025:
The user may start a recurring series on HN, sharing findings from their alias analysis project.
by valbaca on 1/28/25, 9:35 PM
Roast Claims to be a full-stack developer but probably spends more time organizing their Magic: The Gathering cards than organizing their code repositories
Complains about Linux audio issues for 16 years straight but still hasn't switched to Mac - that's some commitment to suffering
Says they can do both frontend and backend but their true specialty is writing sarcastic comments about tech trends
by ddoolin on 1/28/25, 8:52 PM
Pretty good take. This roast was a good guess :)
> Your love for aviation is so strong, you probably have a sectional chart as your desktop wallpaper. Don't worry, we won't tell anyone you prefer VFR over IFR.
by packetlost on 1/28/25, 9:04 PM
by peterldowns on 1/28/25, 9:04 PM
> A Go enthusiast passionate about efficient testing and DevOps, who loves sharing knowledge and book recommendations, and isn't afraid to discuss workplace dynamics.
(the roasts are too lame to reproduce here)
by semking on 1/28/25, 8:51 PM
This HN user is a passionate advocate for ethical AI and SEO practices, with a keen eye for cybersecurity threats. They regularly share insightful stories and comments, often sparking deep discussions on the intersection of technology and ethics.
I loved the positive roast:
This user loves Google so much, they even forgive it for shadow banning their content!
If SEO were a sport, this user would be the champion, but their articles are so long, they need a table of contents!
by rawgabbit on 1/28/25, 9:10 PM
It knows me too well.
by pigscantfly on 1/28/25, 9:02 PM
Roast: They know so much about ancient history, it's like they lived through it! Prediction: The user might embark on an AI-driven archaeology project, blending their passion for history with machine learning.
by loeg on 1/28/25, 9:00 PM
by W0lf on 1/28/25, 8:48 PM
You're a seasoned freelance software consultant with a deep passion for C++ and computer vision. Your contributions on HN are a mix of technical insights, career advice, and a sprinkle of humor, making you a well-rounded and respected member of the community.
by BrandoElFollito on 1/28/25, 9:01 PM
Error Unexpected token 'W', "Webhook er"... is not valid JSON
by cheshire137 on 1/28/25, 11:03 PM
Not a bad guess! This was fun, I enjoyed reading my profile it produced. Thanks for sharing!
by buggy6257 on 1/28/25, 8:58 PM
by bravetraveler on 1/28/25, 9:03 PM
Real
by poiuyt098 on 1/29/25, 7:53 PM
by Rzor on 1/28/25, 9:27 PM
Cheeky little bastard. Love the project. Good job!
by Kerrick on 1/28/25, 9:01 PM
by fsloth on 1/28/25, 9:07 PM
by luke-stanley on 1/28/25, 10:28 PM
by mrweasel on 1/28/25, 8:56 PM
Not really sure if this is a roast or a compliment though:
> Your AI critiques are so sharp, OpenAI might start paying you to stop.
Love the UI as well.
by monero-xmr on 1/28/25, 9:06 PM
by IgorPartola on 1/29/25, 4:02 AM
by shekhar101 on 1/28/25, 11:32 PM
Ouch! This is really well done. :)
by pawelduda on 1/28/25, 9:04 PM
Too personal. Had a great laugh, thanks :D
by upmostly on 1/28/25, 9:07 PM
It knows me so well.
This is incredible.
by theSuda on 1/28/25, 9:06 PM
Note: username is case sensitive.
by noiv on 1/28/25, 9:04 PM
by attentive on 1/28/25, 9:03 PM
by self_awareness on 1/28/25, 9:04 PM
Spot on ;)
by mrkramer on 1/28/25, 8:46 PM
by FergusArgyll on 2/3/25, 6:59 PM
Prediction for 2025:
Deepening involvement in AI startups, potentially founding or investing in companies focused on AGI and its applications.
by brocket on 1/28/25, 10:49 PM
Wow I feel personally attacked ha
by jpc0 on 1/28/25, 9:24 PM
Definitely give it a go.
by CoBE10 on 1/29/25, 8:34 AM
> With their deep knowledge of piracy, they might just consult for a streaming service next!
by 037 on 1/28/25, 9:22 PM
Lol :D
by RGamma on 1/28/25, 11:07 PM
by martinpw on 1/28/25, 9:11 PM
My roast: If comments were code, yours would be the longest PullRequest ever!
Noted.
by andrewfromx on 1/28/25, 8:38 PM
by searine on 1/28/25, 9:09 PM
Shit. Has deepseek cracked AI humor?
by jxm262 on 1/28/25, 9:24 PM
by buggy6257 on 1/28/25, 8:54 PM
Roast: Confusing
Top 3 tech: Nailed it
Predictions: 0 out of 4, and horrifying to consider
by josephb on 1/30/25, 11:26 AM
by svilen_dobrev on 1/28/25, 9:43 PM
by soheil on 1/28/25, 9:07 PM
Will hit the front page with a groundbreaking Show HN post about AI-powered development tools
by senko on 1/28/25, 9:05 PM
by karaterobot on 1/28/25, 9:11 PM
by jasonb05 on 1/28/25, 8:43 PM
by raxxor on 1/29/25, 8:30 AM
That is the price for living in a better world!
I have a young account because I forgot the pwd of my old one and that is probably because for my old account it says...
> You probably use a flip phone and tin foil hat to avoid big tech surveillance
...I didn't provide a mail info for HN, famously part of big tech.
by schmookeeg on 1/29/25, 12:15 AM
> Maintains a homelab that could probably power a small country, just to run Jupyter notebooks
> Claims to hate over-engineered solutions while running a water-cooled PC 'monstrosity' - irony much?
> Probably spends more time optimizing server configurations than actually using them
I literally have no comeback to any of them. Cheers for this laugh. :D
by benterix on 1/28/25, 10:00 PM
"Has stronger opinions about Putin than most people have about their favorite programming languages"
by eps on 1/28/25, 9:23 PM
A thoughtful contrarian who frequently challenges popular
narratives with economic and historical context.
Yeah, great.